Beginning Again Posted on August 4, 2015May 18, 2018 by AspireNB “When we stop caring about what people think, we lose our capacity for connection. When we become defined by what people think, we lose our willingness to be vulnerable. If we dismiss all the criticism, we lose out on important feedback, but if we subject ourselves to the hatefulness, our spirits get crushed. It’s a tightrope, shame resilience is the balance bar, and the safety net below is the one or two people in our lives who can help us reality-check the criticism and cynicism.” – Brene Brown, Ph.D., LMSW I am worthy. I am worthy of change, of hoping for more. I am worthy even though ______________ told me I wasn’t. What would it take for you to feel worthy? Empowered? Content with who you are, right now? It is easy to fall prey to anxiety or shame and let it dictate your life’s course. Maybe you think you are unworthy because you are “supposed” to be farther along in life, or because you have made mistakes in your past. Sometimes you feel unworthy because you suffered trauma, abuse, or just because you are not ______ enough, whatever that may be. If you notice yourself being overly critical, (using the words “always”, “never” or “should” can often be an indication of this) try to take a step back to rephrase. For example, instead of “I can never get it right!” saying: “This feels overwhelming right now, and I can’t do it all. What I can do is ________”. Another way to take care of yourself is to connect with others in a genuine way. Find someone to talk to who will want to learn about the ways you are unique instead of judging you for your differences. Start where you are, be kind to yourself, and work at your own pace. As the saying goes the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today. Instead of helping us “toughen up” and succeed, being critical of ourselves is often our biggest downfall. We gradually shut down, decreasing our ability to be creative, productive, and successful – to dull the very light within us that others may need to see. The very light that propels us to change and grow. Real life is full of maybes, grey areas and unanswered questions. If we can’t believe and trust in ourselves, it will be difficult to achieve our goals, connect with others, and feel content. We are here today to try again- and what a beautiful beginning. -Gillian If you are hoping to make a change in your life, or would just like more information on counseling in general, please call 512-501-2597. You may schedule a free 15 minute phone consultation to ask questions, gain a better understanding of what counseling is like, and decide if it is the right step for you. *** Gillian Amaro, LPC-S I believe that we, as individuals, can create joy, love, and purpose in our lives through authentic connection. I love empowering women, couples & teens to feel comfortable with who they are & gain insight about how they connect with others. I am a Licensed Professional Counselor & Supervisor and offer individual, family & couples sessions, as well as group therapy. My passion for counseling & healthy communication includes stepping out of the office to facilitate workshops and CEU trainings. *** 392 W. Mill St. New Braunfels, TX 78130 www.aspireNB.com Facebook: @AspireNewBraunfels Gillian’s profile on Psychology Today Aspire NB on Facebook
Calming Ourselves in a Chaotic World Posted on June 24, 2015June 28, 2017 by AspireNB “When all our needs are fulfilled, the brain doesn’t need to focus on survival tasks and feels safe enough to open up to our natural presence and uncover happiness.” -Dr. Elisha Goldstein, PhD. Do you ever feel like you don’t have enough time? That you can never do enough or be “good enough”? Maybe you feel everyone is against you? Do you find yourself yelling at other drivers on the road, or losing patience with your closest friends and family members? Sometimes dealing with life’s everyday stressors can get the best of us, and leave us feeling like some of the examples above. It can happen to everyone – and when we are faced with a world that feels chaotic, we struggle more and more with how to understand and experience stress in a way that does not cause harm to ourselves, or our loved ones. The most tempting way to deal with our feelings is often to numb ourselves – with TV, food, constant distractions, or substances. Numbing can be helpful temporarily, but it’s best to learn to cope with these stressors in a way that will interrupt their negative cycle and create more lasting change in our life. According to Farb et.al’s study Minding one’s emotions: Mindfulness training alters the neural expression of sadness, mindfulness training (MT) has been shown to facilitate both recovery from emotional challenge and increased tolerance of negative affect. Here are a few ways to practice calming yourself: 1. Investigate what types of situations trigger negative emotions or behaviors for you, and why. 2. When you know a stressful time is approaching, make plans to connect with a friend or loved one who lifts you up or makes you laugh. 3. Write down short verses that encourage you to stop and create more awareness for yourself. In her book, Uncovering Happiness, Dr. Goldstein gives examples such as “Breathing in, I am here… Breathing out, I am alive” while taking steps inside, or “Breathing in, I notice the colors all around me… Breathing out, I smile” while outside. Another option is “Breathing in, I wash my hands…. Breathing out, gratitude for these hands”. 4. When you are recovering from stress or a triggering situation, take time to engage in meditation. Below are a few examples to get you started. Dr. Goldstein’s 10 minute body scan Sky Mind Meditation Dr. Goldstein’s Sky of Awareness Meditation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtsdz_jhB7c For more information regarding counseling services for stress management, anxiety, perfectionism, or other concerns, please see our contact information below. Thanks, Gillian Aspire New Braunfels PLLC 145 Landa Street, New Braunfels, TX 78130 512-501-2597
Combatting Shame for Mental Health Month Posted on May 5, 2015June 28, 2017 by AspireNB May is National Mental Health Awareness Month! Dr. Brene Brown, author of books “I thought it was just me” and “Daring Greatly” always does a fantastic job of discussing shame and resilience. Many times, individuals experience shame as a result of trauma, harsh or unrealistic family values, misunderstandings, identity, body image or even ignorance about mental health or counseling. Just like physical health or physical fitness, mental health is important to practice daily! Most of us can admit we have at one time or another experienced shame. Sometimes, especially if we have multiple shame triggers, it can spiral into depression or other mental health concerns that hinder our ability to achieve our goals and visions for life. In this short video, Dr. Brene Brown describes the 3 best ways to stop a shame spiral. For more information on Dr. Brene Brown and her work on shame and resilience visit: http://brenebrown.com -Gillian Amaro Aspire New Braunfels PLLC 145 Landa Street, New Braunfels TX 78130 512-501-2597
High School Powerhaus Posted on January 24, 2015June 11, 2018 by AspireNB High School Powerhaus: A Supportive group for high school students In high school, there are so many decisions to make, peer pressures to avoid, and family expectations to uphold. If you are a high school student who feels overwhelmed at times from expectations from school, family, friends & activities, this group is for you! Sometimes, it seems no one understands the pressures that high school can bring, except other high school students. This group allows high schoolers to talk, vent, and support each other, taking time away from outside opinions, and learning what you truly like & need in your life. Group goals include: Purposefully choosing decisions for myself & my future Successfully managing school assignments, tasks, & expectations Finding positive ways to cope with stress Balancing activities, family, friends, school & work Increasing positive communication with parents regarding your feelings & needs Boundary setting Goal setting Meditation & Relaxation Exercises Meeting like-minded high school students Accepting support & requesting feedback from HS peers in a safe environment Laughing This group meets once a month on Monday evenings. Cost: $40/session This will be a closed group, meaning that once we begin a series, I will not let anyone new into the group. This allows for higher levels of confidentiality and safety. I keep groups small, with no more than 6 participants per group, so that I can easily attend to each member’s needs. For specific dates & times, questions, or to reserve your space, please contact Gillian Amaro, M.Ed., LPC at 512-501-2597.
New Counseling Location! Posted on January 1, 2015February 26, 2016 by AspireNB We are excited to announce that we have a new counseling location here in New Braunfels! 145 Landa Street, New Braunfels TX 78130- a beautiful, historic building close to the plaza downtown. In addition, there is a room just for our counseling groups. We still have a counseling space in San Marcos, however we are slowly moving all clients to the New Braunfels location. All new counseling appointments will be scheduled in New Braunfels at the location above. If you are seeking counseling and want to schedule an appointment, or if you have questions regarding counseling or the counseling process, please feel free to give us a call at 512-501-2597. We offer free phone consultations and are usually able to return your call within 24 hours.
Welcome to Aspire New Braunfels, PLLC with Gillian Amaro Posted on September 4, 2014September 9, 2015 by AspireNB Gillian Amaro, M.Ed, LPC Aspire New Braunfels, PLLC Aspire: as·pire verb \ə-ˈspī(-ə)r\ : to want to have or achieve something 1 : to seek to attain or accomplish a particular goal 2 : ascend, soar Welcome! Thank you for considering counseling. Aspire New Braunfels, PLLC is formed with the idea that we can all create wellness in our lives and that each one of us is capable of defining and accomplishing our own unique goals. Sometimes that may be moving forward in a logical or predictable way. Sometimes, what may look like a step backward is actually a step forward. Counseling is above all, a relationship in which a counselor walks beside you, listening to your story, offering support, and challenging you at key moments. It is very important that you choose someone who you trust and feel at ease with. Sometimes counseling may be short. It may help you to learn concrete skills to improve relationships, reduce stress, increase productivity or to improve other symptoms that have a negative impact on your life. It can also give support during a challenging transition or life event. I believe that we, as individuals, have power over our thoughts and actions. At the same time, we can be affected & troubled by outside influences, as we are closely interconnected with the world around us- from our friends, family, and community to the world at large. As you work towards achieving your goals, I will help you gain awareness about your unique strengths- as well as obstacles that may hinder your progress. I am a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Texas and earned my Masters degree in Counseling and Guidance from Texas State in 2009. Since then, I have worked in nonprofit agencies, alternative schools, and in private practice. I am continually attending new trainings and reading new material related to my clients and practice. In addition, I am trained in the Gottman Method and am a member of the American Counseling Association. I enjoy finding ways to integrate your interests into the counseling process. These can include art, music, books, writing, the great outdoors, and physical activity. I look forward to hearing from you soon! I can be contacted in the following ways: Phone: 512.501.2597 Email: amaro@aspireNB.com Counseling Office: 145 Landa Street, New Braunfels, TX 78130 Mailing Address: PO Box #311114, New Braunfels, TX 78131 During the week, I will answer your calls as long as I am not with another client. If I do not answer, I will make every effort to respond to your call or email within 24 hours. After Hours Contact: During evenings, weekends, and holidays I may not be able to return your call within 24 hours. However, I will make every effort to return your call on the first business day that I return. Emergency Contact: In any event where you are a danger to yourself or others, or when someone else is endangering your safety, you must immediately call 911, or the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
Resources Posted on August 3, 2014February 16, 2018 by AspireNB The following are a compilation of books, local resources, programs & websites I have found to be helpful. Check back often as it will continue to grow! Crisis/Emergency Counseling: Call the national emergency hotline at 1-800-273-8255 or 911 if you are in any type of crisis. The lifeline is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and will immediately connect you with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. National Suicide Prevention & Crisis Hotline Crisis Center of Comal County Hill Country MHDD Centers Women: I thought it was just me This book by Brene Brown defines shame as “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging” and explains how this shame we carry can underlie depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and much more. Daring Greatly Another book by Brene Brown, this one focuses more on how the courage to be vulnerable can change our lives for the better. Life is a verb Written by Patti Digh, this beautifully designed book encourages readers to live “each individual, glorious, simple day with more intention” and say yes, be generous, speak up, love more, trust yourself, and slow down. Resources for Families: McKenna Parenting Program in New Braunfels: this is a wonderful program for educating and providing support to families through the crucial first years of their child’s life. The Relationship Cure Written by John M. Gottman, Ph.D., this book applies over 20 years of research to not just couples but all relationships, including families, friendships, and work relationships. A Mighty Girl: A fantastic collection of books, toys and movies and advice for smart, confident, and courageous girls and their families. Reviving Ophelia A classic book written by Mary Pipher, PhD on the specific battles young girls & teens face in our society and offers parents compassion, strength, and strategies to revive their young girls. Violet This is a great book for children who have parents of mixed heritage, families who have adopted, or any child. I love this book and think it is a wonderful way to start positive conversations about race, culture, and how we each are different and unique. Kindermoms of New Braunfels: this is a group for moms wishing to meet and connect with other local moms. They strive to create a place for moms to meet while at the same time engaging with their kids in fun and play. Texas DFPS : Allows you to search local child care facilities, compare facility inspection ratings, and read full inspection reports to find the best care for your child. Postpartum Support International: this is a website dedicated to explaining depression during pregnancy and postpartum, as well as a collection of resources, information, and online ways to connect with other moms. Dinosaurs Divorce: A guide for changing families This book is for children whose parents are going through a divorce and helps guide conversations that will need to happen regarding all the changes in family life that come with divorce. Written by Laurene Krasny Brown & Marc Brown. Standing on My Own Two Feet: A child’s affirmation of love in the midst of divorce This book, written and illustrated by Tamara Schmitz, helps to remind your child that they are loved by both parents, even when mom and dad do not get along or divorce. Stop Bullying Now Campaign Resources for Couples: The Gottman Institute: A research-based approach to creating stronger relationships. I have successfully completed Levels 1 & 2 in the Gottman Couples Method and use this approach. I feel it is the best approach for premarital counseling, communication struggles, relationships, and marriage counseling. The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert Written by John M. Gottman, PhD, this book is a great book to start with if you have no prior knowledge about his research and are looking to improve your marriage. It explains Gottman’s theory, research, and includes exercises similar to the ones he uses in his workshops for you to try at home. Websites and Blogs: Brene Brown, PhD., LMSW: research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. She has spent the past decade studying vulnerability, courage, worthiness, and shame, and has written several books on vulnerability, courage, and shame. The Gottman Relationship Blog: Articles & advice based on the Gottman Method, which I use in counseling couples and families. American Counseling Association Gillian’s profile on Psychology Today: For more information regarding insurance options and group details. Aspire New Braunfels- on Facebook Aspire New Braunfels – on Alignable LGBTQ individuals: LGBT facts for teens It Gets Better Project Parents: Helping your LGB teen stay healthy The Welcoming Project Anxiety: Helping your anxious child A great step-by-step book for parents of children who struggle with anxiety, written by Ronald M. Rapee, Ph.D., Ann Wignall, D.Psych., Susan H. Spence, PhD., Vanessa Cobham, PhD., and Heidi Lyneham, Ph.D. The Invisible String A heartwarming story that helps children understand that they are connected to their loved ones, even when they are apart. Written by Patrice Karst, this story is wonderful for many different situations. When my Worries Get too Big! A relaxation book for children who live with anxiety, by Kari Dunn Buron Relax a guide to relaxing and calming down; includes instructions & prompts for young children I thought it was just me This book by Brene Brown defines shame as “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging” and explains how this shame we carry can underlie depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and much more. Daring Greatly Another book by Brene Brown, this one focuses more on how the courage to be vulnerable can change our lives for the better. Facing Panic: Self-help for people with panic attacks Written by renowned anxiety disorders expert Reid Wilson, PhD, this book includes techniques and exercises to manage and overcome panic attacks and panic disorder. Anxiety and Depression Association of America Information on anxiety. This site also has a link for teens to take a anxiety disorders self-test. International OCD Foundation The mission of the International OCD Foundation is to help individuals with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and related disorders to live full and productive lives. College Students & Teens: How to be an adult A handbook on psychological and spiritual integration by David Richo, this book guides readers on their positive journey from fear, through power, to love. Helping teens who cut This is a great book for families of teens who cut and helps explain self-injury and ways to cope with extreme emotions without resorting to self-injury. Written by Michael Hollander, PhD. MAD: A guide for teens Written by James J. Crist, PhD, this is an easy to read book for teens who need help dealing with their anger and getting respect- my favorite teen book on anger. Grief & Bereavement: On Grief & Grieving: Finding the meaning of grief through the five stages of loss, by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler: Elizabeth Kubler-Ross is one of the most respected authorities on death and dying and this book is a great place to start. The Invisible String A heartwarming story that helps children understand that they are connected to their loved ones, even when they are apart. Written by Patrice Karst, this story is wonderful for many different situations. ADD & ADHD: Smart but Scattered Written by Peg Dawson, EdD and Richard Guare, PhD, this book helps parents to help their children with ADHD get organized, stay focused, plan ahead, follow through on tasks, and solve problems. Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD) Depression: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Call 1-800-273-8255 or 911 if you are in any type of crisis. The lifeline is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and will immediately connect you with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. The Upward Spiral: Using neuroscience to reverse the course of depression, one small change at a time Written by Alex Korb, PhD, a neuroscientist in the department of psychiatry at the University of California, Los Angeles. This book gives straightforward tips to help alleviate depression, using proven strategies that are supported by the most recent research in neuroscience. Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness & Self-Compassion Written by Elisha Goldstein, PhD, this book explains some of the latest research regarding depression, the brain, and treatment, in an easy to read format, while also sharing straightforward tools and techniques. I don’t want to talk about it Written by Terrence Real, this book talks about depression in men – and the families that love them. I thought it was just me This book by Brene Brown speaks mostly to women and defines shame as “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging” and explains how this shame we carry can underlie depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and much more. Helping teens who cut This is a great book for families of teens who cut and helps explain self-injury and ways to cope with extreme emotions without resorting to self-injury. Written by Michael Hollander, PhD. If your Adolescent Has Depression or Bipolar Disorder: An essential resource for parents Written by Dwight Evans & Linda Wasmer Andrews, this is written for parents and other caregivers of adolescents with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder or depression. Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance This is a patient directed national organization focusing on the most prevalent mental illnesses and provides up-to-date, scientifically based tools written in language that is reader friendly. Families for Depression Awareness This is an organization dedicated to informing and supporting the family members of people experiencing depressive disorders to help them support their loved ones. Brain & Behavior Research Foundation on Depression This site provides information and fact sheets regarding depression. Other books & websites I recommend: I hate you, don’t leave me Written by Jerold J. Kreisman, MD, and Hal Straus, this is a must-read for friends, family, and anyone who has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. A terrible thing happened Written by Margaret M. Holmes, this book focuses on children who have witnessed any kind of violent or traumatic episode, including physical or verbal abuse, school or gang violence, accidents, homicide, suicide, and natural disasters such as floods or fires. An afterword by Sasha J. Mudlaff is a great resource for parents and other caregivers. National Eating Disorders Association The National Eating Disorders Association website has stories of recovery from eating disorders, information about seeking treatment, and additional resources for school professionals and caregivers. National Institute of Mental Health This is the government site for mental health and gives a wealth of up-to-date information, downloadable packets and fact sheets. National Institute on Drug Abuse Provides additional links to information for parents, teens, health professionals, teachers and others. Alcoholics Anonymous website Al-Anon website Family and friends of problem drinkers. Includes information for teens who want to join. Narcotics Anonymous website
Project S.H.E counseling group Posted on May 6, 2014February 16, 2018 by AspireNB Aspire New Braunfels is excited to team up with Lauren Cavanagh, certified CrossFit trainer and Licensed Professional Counselor at New Braunfels Center for Counseling and Play Therapy! Together we will offer a unique new counseling group beginning soon. Here are the details! What: Project S.H.E. is part counseling support group, part fitness class, and part FUN for young women of middle school age. Sessions will include: Discussion, Workout & Expressive Activities. Why: Our focus is to facilitate strength, courage, self-confidence & support among young women. Location: Alpha Crossfit 1153 N. Academy Ave. New Braunfels, TX 78130 Dates: Every Wednesday, from June 10th thru July 29th* 10:00 am – 11:30 am *July 1 – NO GROUP Fee: $280/Individual (Includes all 7 weeks) Interested? Space is limited and pre-registration is required. Please call Gillian Amaro at 512-501-2597 for further questions about the counseling group – or to begin the registration process.